augmented

The augmentation fad has
Really caught on…
Not the ‘in-thing’
Actually the norm in fact;
For in my time I have discovered many
With eyes so blue, so clear,
Their brains showed clean through!
Deep mops of hair, so thick that
Many a comb has been lost;
Spiders set up shop there--unnoticed--
Chickadees nest and return year after year.
My investigations have uncovered
Uncrooked fingers, siphoned blubber,
Electrolysis en masse .
Neck, arms, butts and breasts,
And get this: vocal chords.
This day alone I started upon hearing
Cary Grant and Ethyl Merman
Conversing, and turning to look seeing
They were Bob and Sue! Who knew?
So on a quest for filler,
Chapter 10 required a fluffing
And my grant providing leeway
For a plane ride and a cup of Joe,
To San Fran I flew to visit a couple so altered,
None knew their names.
Big Joe and Lulu they answered to, remembered they said,
When called.
Lulu was a fine girl, frilly bouncing and pure cream,
Her tufted white locks done up in pompoms and pink ribbons.
Big Joe with leather cuffs and scars,
Deliberately maintained, and studs all around.
Little was said, but I was offered crunchy snacks
And for a while we played catch with a tennis ball.
Lulu loved tinkle bells.
Our daughter--they proudly beckoned at her nursery door--
Was surely a beauty, not unlike her handsome folks.
Lovely ones, with exquisite progeny, no doubt.
I looked in, cute she was, as a button.
Snuggled deep into her pink bedding,
Contentedly chewing on a pink rubber bone.
Unaugmented, perfect as God made her,
Her genes generously passed from parents proud and doting.
Tinkerbell was etched upon her tag, and tinkle they did,
When she wagged at me.