the war inside of me

for the 10th Daughter of Memory --this piece won for me my 3rd Tenth Daughter of Memory...wow!

I am sitting in my underwear, and a black hat. This loaded Winchester is cocked and loaded for bear, and I am waiting for you. So long ago, I can't remember now, but I did have some joy in my life—it was another world. One day you'll find me, again, I don't know what you are waiting for. Do you expect me to find pleasure again? Do you really think I would invite an innocent woman or a child into my life...just knowing you would return to cause their misfortune?
I have tied buckets of nails to the door jambs. Rolls of duct tape adorn my walls, and the ripped pages of magazines a shrine to your blatant acts of disrespect upon my world. Every penny I have is my contribution to the war effort—I will bring you down alone, for beside me there are no believers. I possess the only information to bring about the downfall of you, you and your evil ways.

You took away my life, now the only thing I own is hatred; everything else is reserved for you.

I was a carefree lad, accomplished, a woman at my side. We had success and spent it recklessly. The times we spent roaming the universe, rolling in the grass, hiking the pristine valleys that went unnoticed and never appeared on maps. At the park entrance I bought a rocking chair built from bone and horns, even that is a testament to my loathing—this chair I sit upon is a throne built for a king, the war room of your defeat. When you finally come I will be waiting here, for you. Thinking you will catch me unaware, maybe with my pants down? Ha, now you know I don't bother with them. Come on, bring it!

There are places in the wilds where people aren't meant to be. Perhaps the Indians knew of them, but they left no warning signs. Nothing is as remote on this planet as it used to be—maybe the indigents were unworried, or maybe they believed later generations had it coming to them; if it was a sacred spot we had no idea, and blindly we entered. For this we suffered mightily, and she died if only to break my spirit. When I escaped it was damaged, cracked enough to give my peers an uncommon look at a madman. Still, I recovered, renewed by a fervor that grew from my young body. I rebounded unaware of how powerful my foe really was, or of its desires. I didn't know yet what I'd released onto the world.

So I lived and found happiness, and I had a family. My love was strong and I was hardened and observant—forever on the look out; there was always something on the periphery...i didn't yet know how true that was.
I had everything; an office in the sky, faithful employees—they were like my family. My loved ones and I flew to every corner of the earth, but only the safe corners. We stayed far away from unexplored caves and the car was never outside of hiking distance. I became an expert in self defense, and had the funds to hire personal guards to watch over my family when I wasn't near.

I underestimated you. You took them away, all of them. A simple plane crash, but they died fighting. Then you sank your teeth into my fortress in the sky, and the results were devastating. Your servants are everywhere, inducted into your house of pain. Indoctrinated in hate, brainwashed. There are lofty goals, and then there are twisted ideals and perversion. I'll have none of it...not anymore.
This is all I have left, and I will wait in the chair I've reserved for you. You know I am here, so stop ravaging the land searching; stop your procrastination and come find me, our mutual hate has to count for something, you owe me this war, and I'll have it, worm of death!

My black hat is a sign, a token of my respect. I will defeat you the only way I know how, and that is to become like you. In this you have won, to turn me, but it will taste bitter, this victory, in your defeat.