Pie down! A Frenzy....Adventures in HOBO

In the Land of Hobo :::@

Requesting all Who Know … Forget everything and Return to Sender !

This edition of the Hobo Post brought to you by Monkey Chips … not really pieces of fried monkey parts , they only smell that way !

Discontinue scanning Information !

Not for the faint of heart , go back , to the beginning , warped and inane and unpleasant as it was … it is the only reasonable thing to do ! Beware !

Not to be maggoty , but gosh , look out for variable sky-breeches , coming to an avenue near you !

Do not , i repeat , do not leave any unarmored appendages outside of the moving vehicle , always wear a hat , keep a clean rear view mirror , and smile when the mechanized-portal-grabbers nab you !

Egad , My Wireless sets me Free

>> aCument0r’s
Radiant gaze set hard upon my pliant innards
Thru the odorous vapors i sense (~)
How deeply the earthly virus has affected my being =
Feeling , tasting the protective plastic of my wiring melt away .
Now + coming unplugged
Away in no time like the present (now)
From the Pickler’s communication grid !
My innards , the electrics* , influence computations
Little in my neural programming .
Wireless i‘ve become , central transmitter collating
Data without the benefit of hardware …
Fine thing , as it
is Beginning to puddle
on the steel grate floor .

*electrics = defunct anonymous redundancies i.e. possibly akin to the human gall bladder . Say it fast : gallbladdergallbladdergallbladderglawlbadlergobadgerblabberdoogobawobberjamstubmytoeblavver .

?

However , Acumentor via the virus of which i introduced into the Pickler , now suffers the same fate . Being the sophisticated machine it is , it has now put itself ahead of the ship it once served . Fancy baubles , shiny things it desires , and i now hindered its quest for more.
By alerting the Pickler’s mainframe i had halted the collection of junk by way of a pneumatic tube , the same as had sucked me in an antigravity spin into the bowels of the Pickler . Consequently , the influx of crapandjunk ceased , Acumentor hissed a menacing sizzle , and brainy as it was , wanting more , intended to displace this nuisance , to turn up the heat besides
.

War of the Newfangled Brainblasts!

The aCumentor thrusts forward its cables , edging from its harness and trounces the metal supports , flinging them like nunchucks at my unarmored mug . Cables like great black pythons wrap the heaps of jewels back into its protective grasp and it opens up its massive intellect to me , spilling electrified dendrites skyward to breech our gulf . They are like tiny warships , Hell machines equipped to bamboozle my boozler , and fry my minions of newlygoodliness .
i am sent into vertigo , my sparse capacity still adjusting to the viral modification , unable to respond in due fashion adequately … fated to be festooned , insinuated to a paisley demise by Acumentor’s frilly sensitivities !

`

It sends a Fleur de lis tattoo into Upper Hemispheres

Disequilibria floods my viralwits , Acumentor being the superior tactician , but it doesn’t account for experience , of which much i’ve accumulated while it shuffled amid the scrap and hoarded trinkets . Predictably i employ the Epley maneuver and with a minimum of flailing regain composure and cram my drawers brimming full of jewelry , plucking foremost the faceted pair of ulexite eyeballs that glowered over me .

In a gross exhibit of humanity Acumentor
cries havoc and lets fly the cogs of a boor
distressed at a loss of superfluous extremity
, and whines , gnashing gear on gear , crying foul , floundering like a wounded duck ,
a persimmon’s eight radiant spikes dissected and yawing ,
fringing on chaos and popping springs verbosely in a verdant upwelling of duplicity ;
it showers unceasing into the bejeweled cubby , growing exponentially in its self obliteration .

Pickler’s Fate & the Scattering of Parts is Parts

Too late to save the barrels of Infinity Spackle , i trust the contraption’s conniption to contract inversely and scatter the Spackle to the wind to the 4-corners of the earth in a spiral dispersion , thus completing my viral function , to infect the machines worldwide and bring down the obnoxious rule of the tyrannical nuts&bolts . With no time for elucidation , i relegated my resolve to abdicating the Pickler , going by way of a Duck flap maintenance tube , i fabricated a pod and flung my whole being into the recesses of space , away from the outwardly expanding Acumentor and the disintegrating Pickler . i would give myself to the skies and what will be will be ….